After a separation, a child has a right to contact with both parents, and each parent is both entitled and obliged to maintain contact. If the parents cannot agree on arrangements, there is an orderly path to a solution.
The principle
The law puts the child at the centre: the child has its own right to contact with each parent (section 1684(1) German Civil Code, BGB). Both parents must refrain from anything that impairs the child's relationship with the other parent (section 1684(2) BGB). Contact is therefore neither a reward nor a means of pressure, for example over unpaid maintenance.
No fixed rule
The law does not prescribe a particular schedule. Contact every other weekend and for half of the school holidays is common. What matters, however, is the child's age, the distance between the homes, previous care arrangements and the child's wishes, which carry more weight as the child grows older. A shared care arrangement (Wechselmodell), in which the child spends roughly equal time with both parents, may also be considered if it is in the child's best interests.
First step: the youth welfare office
Parents are entitled to advice and support from the youth welfare office (Jugendamt) in exercising contact (section 18(3) Social Code Book VIII). This is free of charge and often leads to a workable agreement. Any agreement should be recorded in writing.
Court proceedings
If no agreement is reached, the family court decides on application. Contact proceedings are to be dealt with as a priority and expeditiously; a first hearing should take place no later than one month after the proceedings begin (section 155 Act on Proceedings in Family Matters, FamFG). The youth welfare office is involved, the court frequently appoints a guardian ad litem to represent the child's interests, and the child is usually heard. The court works towards an agreement. A settlement approved by the court is just as binding as a court order.
If contact arrangements are not observed
If a court-ordered contact arrangement is not complied with, the court can impose a coercive fine or coercive detention (section 89 FamFG). There is also a court mediation procedure (section 165 FamFG). A parent who suspends contact on their own initiative usually weakens their position in the proceedings.
Restriction and exclusion
The court can only restrict or exclude contact where this is necessary for the child's welfare (section 1684(4) BGB). In such cases, supervised contact in the presence of a third person is often ordered first.
Grandparents and siblings also have a right of contact if it serves the child's welfare (section 1685(1) BGB).
The Federal Ministry of Justice presented a draft reform of child law in 2026. This article reflects the law currently in force.